Saturday, August 28, 2010

Crash Land ...

Hop, Skip and Jump, if i could ever describe my career in 3 words, this would be it. The eternal crests and troughs, as i go through the different phases of a professional career. Which reminds me, how many of you guys actually burn out as much as I do or maybe even faster?

Its going to be 3 years since i first came to this country. Time sure flies, in this time period, i hopped from being a consultant to a full time employee skipped as i fought hard to win a losing battle which was to face an imminent lay off, joined another tech major only to get "REDDIED" that i finally landed up where i am right now. 3 years, 4 employers and people yet believe, we guys are taking away jobs, when the truth is, its a vicious circle and it takes more than guts to survive.

I wish i had it easy. At times i really do, but i know for sure, that if I was supposed to have it so easy, i might not even try to survive as much as i do now. Now that makes sense to me, unless it really consumes me, i lose interest faster than a stressed out woman, who is given a no limits credit card to shop.

As i leave out the cosy confines of Ohio, i look out and suddenly i realize, it is beautiful, much beautiful that i thought. The early morning sun ain't playing any games, and the beautiful forests on either side of the interstate don their hats of fog in all their splendor. I actually want to stop and take a few snaps, but I am afraid, if I change my mind, I might just head back home and forget about relocation and this new position all together.

And then it happens. I am jolted back from sleep, kaput!!! the dream is over and with that all my major plans, i had been making. It does not matter if its not my fault. If someone took as much as 1 month to roll out an offer and 2 months to even begun processing my transfer application. In the end, a budget cut made all the difference and I was left holding onto an offer letter which is perhaps worth as much as a toilet paper.

I might have seen it coming, but if i did i think i overlooked it. Even in corporate america, people do actually make you an offer and then conveniently refuse to honor it. so who do i complain to now? actually no one, because the more i look at it, the more i feel that this is how it was meant to be.

I started off at a new firm, a far less glamorous role that whatever i had done so far. It keeps me busy, i don't leave work till about 7-8 in the evening. It consumes me much more than i had bargained for and most importantly, it rarely gives me the time to think about what went wrong and where. I am waiting for time, I know it heals all wounds, and i am waiting to see how long it takes.

As for now, life goes on. I suddenly miss Ohio a lot more, i have reasons to, I had a few good friends there and life was a ball at least till last month it was. But looks like god had other plans and so here I am. Hopefully this experience will make me a stronger man, if not better so lets just wait and see how it goes ...

Aah Life... here i come ....