A Question !!!

A Question !!

what hurts more ?

• the knowledge that you were taken for a ride since the start and yet you acted along?

• the castles you built were made of sand and all that was needed was just a dying wave to break them?

• that sometimes no matter how genuine you are some still stick to their initial judgment ?

• that by not containing your excitement, you have actually hurt more people than making them happy?

• that no matter how happy or confident you may be, there still would be issues that break apart your inner self?

• that just when you comment "I am happy because..." Grief comes and knocks on your door?

• that no matter how hard you try, you still lose and lose again and again and again for no fault of yours....

Is it just stupidity or is it just that I am a moron who gets into such mess each time? And what am I supposed to do now ? wallow in this sleazy self pithy filth or face the facts and move on?

I really want to and eventually I will but fact remains that in a foreign land and all by myself, I just end up cursing the day I ventured out on this adventure.

If i could ever get myself out of this hyper-helpless-self-pithy mode I will prove to be just worth so much more for a change.

But from where I stand right now, a respite seems to be so far away !!!